Wednesday, May 27, 2009

We Got Nuttin

On Monday, May 25th, North Korea tested "successfully" a nuclear device and three short-range missiles. The Norks like holidays, especially those of capitalist running dogs. It was Memorial Day in the US, as well as Star Wars Day. Thus, people who would have liked to enjoy the holiday had to come in to work. But the joke was on the Dear Leader. It was cold, dark, and rainy in Washington and whoever could escape from the kids and the house chores welcomed it.

The next day, North Korea test-fired three more short-range missiles. The Japanese PM said that Tokyo had the legal right to a pre-emptive strike in self-defense and the South Koreans discussed getting their own nuclear weapon and joined the Proliferation Security Initiative. The US Ambassador hissed that North Korea will "have to pay a price" for its provocations. All very reassuring.

Yet, what can be done? As Our Man in Abiko, I need to turn to lifting ideas from others. Washington's information source, Chris Nelson points to blogger Andy Borowitz for an answer:

May 26, 2009

U.S. to Respond to North Korea with 'Strongest Possible Adjectives'

Obama: 'We are Prepared to Consult Thesaurus'

One day after North Korea launched a successful test of a nuclear weapon, President Obama said that the United States was prepared to respond to the threat with "the strongest possible adjectives."

In remarks to reporters at the White House, Mr. Obama said that North Korea should fear the "full force and might of the United States' arsenal of adjectives" and called the missile test "reckless, reprehensible, objectionable, senseless, egregious and condemnable."

Standing at the President's side, Vice President Joseph Biden weighed in with some tough adjectives of his own, branding North Korean President Kim Jong-Il "totally wack and illin'.

Later in the day, Defense Secretary Robert Gates called the North Korean nuclear test "supercilious and jejune," leading some in diplomatic circles to worry that the U.S. might be running out of appropriate adjectives with which to craft its response.

But President Obama attempted to calm those fears, saying that the United States was prepared to "scour the thesaurus" to come up with additional adjectives and was "prepared to use adverbs" if necessary.

"Let's be clear: we are not taking adverbs off the table," Mr. Obama said. "If the need arises, we will use them forcefully, aggressively, swiftly, overwhelmingly and commandingly.

OK, so you got anything better?

1 comment:

  1. Lady, Our Man lifts from others, doesn't cut and paste whole articles. But glad to see the gospel of St Ourmani Nabiko is spreading, forcefully, aggressively, swiftly, overwhelmingly and commandingly.


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